Posted by: Viola | June 5, 2016

Finding the heart to say “I love you”

“I love you” can be one of the hardest things to say. So I have heard. So I am told. But what is so hard about saying “I love you” and what about those three words causes people to quiver with fear, afraid of admitting such a beautiful emotion?

I–this is a word, but it is also one letter. It is one letter. What could be hard about saying “I” in the context of love? We use “I” all day long. We use it so much that we dare not even bother counting. And yet, pair it with loving another person, and that very same “I” gets stuck in the throat, lodged there, unable to flow and fly from the lips.

LOVE–this is a word, a small word. There are much bigger words out there. Longer words. Heavier words. Scarier words. Terrifying words. But LOVE, ought to be light, ought to be soft and feathery, like dove or clove. Instead, when it comes to using this word to say how we feel about a person, the word becomes thick, scratchy, hard to say. Stuck.

YOU–this is also a word, also a small word. And we use it all the time, we use it to say you-this and you-that and you and and you and you. It is the less dangerous, more impersonal “second person” when you write a story out. But when that you becomes the subject of that emotion called love, the you becomes dangerous, becomes a risk, a liability. I can lose you, I can get hurt by you.

Maybe these three small words are words we have to repeat often, so that we grow more accustomed to letting them flow off our tongues. Would saying “I love you” all day long somehow cheapen the phrase? Would saying it to too many people lessen its meaning, dilute its emotional significance? Or have we been hurt by way too many “yous” that we have felt “love” for, and now the “I” that we are is simply weary? So weary that it cannot find its own heart. So burned out that it cannot find the heart to say “I love you.” ❤




  1. This is beautiful! Thanks your sharing

  2. *for sharing

  3. A very precisely explained post on Love!.

  4. I’ll call her now and say those 3 words. I don’t see why I shouldn’t. It’s 3 simple, honest words… And I should say them more often.
    Thanks. You’re an inspiration

    • Yes… do share your feelings with her. It’s a lovely thing to say how you feel.

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